Reflections

A mockingbird has taken up residence in a tree overlooking my yard. It is an amusingly absent mockingbird, because while I can hear it clearly, even from inside my house, I’ve not actually seen it. It showed up at midnight on March 12th. It’s been singing every night since then. Shining a flashlight towards it causes it to hide and go silent.

We’ve never had a mockingbird here before. I’ve never seen or heard one until this one arrived. I recorded it and played the recordings back to it, and it mimicked itself. Then I whistled towards it, and it repeated my whistles. Perfectly mirroring whatever sound I put to it.


Curious that it should show up when it did. Those of you who follow this blog, as well as hang out in our discord, might remember that there have been an number of synchronicities around birds over the past few months. Birds, of course, are messengers and have their own language. But March 11th was an interesting day.

A friend on a discord chat had lost an item. Specifically, the SB7 radio she uses for Estes sessions. We all joked around for a few minutes about where it could be, and maybe we could use remote viewing to find it. She was in a rush to get to work, and so she didn’t have time to remote view it, and so… I told her where it was.

I didn’t remote view it, and I didn’t know where it was. I’ve never seen her home in person, nor even met her in person. If you had asked me if I knew where it was, I would have said no. But, I typed out a location without even thinking about it and, to her (and my) surprise when she looked, it was there. Rather than me consciously attempting to find where the object was in the world, it was like the world was reflecting wherever I said it was going to be.

Shortly after, another friend asked me to find a different object. Again, without thinking about it I told her exactly where it was. A few hours later, another asked me to find something she had lost, and once again I simply typed down a location in her house, describing the things around it, and it was there. Objects I was not familiar with in houses that I’d never seen belonging to people whom I’ve never met outside of the internet. This repeated over the next few days with other people and other lost objects.


Earlier that day, I had the realization that an experience I had a few days before was actually an awakening. Though, one might say that it was only an awakening after I realized it was one, so it was the day I realized it in which I woke up. This was stage 3 in the Magia cosmology.

My experience of it was simpler than some previous awakenings. I was reflecting on stage 2, and what it was like. Stage 2, for me, happened from transmission from a teacher. Suddenly, I was staring The Source in the face. A brilliant point of light that had a specific location in physical space, but also was inside of me. Of course, I wasn’t seeing it with my physical eyes, but with a different sort of knowing. From this light, all consciousness was emanating. It truly was an awe inspiring and blissful experience.

As I thought back on this, something changed. The Source was no longer a point outside and a point inside. Instead, the point which appeared to be outside was simply a direct, and very literal, reflection of The Source inside of me. It became immediately clear that I was staring into a mirror, and absolutely everything was either a reflection of that divine light, or a shadowy modification of that light. The light that was coming from within me, and was me. There was nothing else except for that.

All had become one. There was no longer two separate worlds, here in time and elsewhere of eternity. Instead, I was within both simultaneously and could no longer tell them apart. They were, and are, the same thing.


Strangely, there was no bliss and awe experienced this time. Instead it was just a deep DEEP knowing that this was true. And humor. Humor that I had not seen it before, when it was so clearly in front of me at that exact moment.

The previous week, I had done a binding. Inviting a shadow that had been bothering me to step into the light so that I could see it clearly and then to return home. At the time, this binding had not seemed relevant to any upcoming awakening in any fashion. It dealt with a few moments in my life where I spoke up to an authority figure, and kept speaking longer and longer despite the fact that they weren’t listening to me. This binding resolved with a realization of absent authority and a lack of need to explain myself to one in the first place. Just me and only me existing in the moment was fine.

It was nice to have that resolved, but at the time I was blind to it having anything to do with anything related to my practice. It was reviewing this binding on the 11th that kicked off the realization that my earlier experience was an awakening.

I didn’t give a thought that it might have been one, because I was searching again for the awe and bliss that had come with previous ones. But looking back, this was an ideal way for it to have happened. There was no need for it to be a shocking experience, one being shown to me by divinity or to being kicked off by a realized teacher. No external authority was needed because… there isn’t one. At least, not from this perspective at the top of the mountain. Like the mountain itself, this is a singular and one pointed place.


So, here I stand at the peak of the mountain. The world reflected around me in the song of a mockingbird, I look upward to the stars and prepare for the journey back down into the forest.